Women Don’t Verb Good
David writes, “This was an email in response to our University’s latest mailing of our Alumni Magazine. I have removed all specifics to protect the guilty.”
I’m skeptical of this gentleman’s assertions, but he seems so sure of himself. I think I’m going to have to listen to the ladies a bit more carefully. Who are they, really?
You should know that before I throw in the trash your stupid “alumnus” magazine, some of us have good education and recognize evil when we see it. Where is the report questioning the awarding of degrees in Sociology, Women’s Studies, and the like? Where is the article questioning the renaming of the Business Administration school to something from outer space like management? There isn’t such a thing as “management”, it’s just a title awarded to employees instead of giving them a pay raise. Come on Uof__, get with reality. Jeepers. You’re looking like a bunch of fools.
Look, its time to realize that woman aren’t people. They just repeat yesterday all over again each day. If you listen to their conversations, you will note the absence of verbs. They can’t do life. They can’t do Earth. You shouldn’t have all your staff positions occupied by non-humans. It shows in your Alumnus magazine. Fake nonsense is not a good idea.
Class of ‘65
Submitted By: David
@crazyemails
I woman. I not person. I from outer space. I from same planet as management. On management, there no verbs.
Awesome. I laughed so hard I cried.
wow. that’s all i have to say. and this guy got a college education?
@Duncan
Yeah I was just sgt.drilling you (if you will). Actually, your taking his comments out of context is a funny technique people used to do with audio recordings of politicians in the 60s and beyond. I commend you for your effort!
@It
I was called lame by a schoolmate I thought was one of my best friends at the time. :’(
Hmph! Me? Both woman AND human. Verbs in my conversations? All the time, every single one, actually. This man’s statement about women and lack of verbs? Ridiculous!
Honestly, some people’s kids!
I find it at least a little funny that there is not one verb in your comment, despite your indignation. I imagine that was not on accident, or else this the funniest coincidence in the history of this website…
@Dean
[I] Understand the implied “you”. In imperative statements, of course “you” is implied or understood. [I] Don’t believe first and third person pronouns should be dropped. [I am] Not familiar with ‘all’ the other languages, but have some familiarity with Spanish. Usually the verb endings imply the subject (e.g.,”quiero” for “I want; “quieres” for “you want” or “do you want” if it’s a question; “Ud. quiere” for a more formal version–e.g., a student to a teacher).
Also, [I] find it irritating when people drop the “to be” in statements, e.g., “car needs [to be] washed.” This is quite common with folks from western PA.
What?
“Fake nonsense is not a good idea.” Agreed. But REAL nonsense is the greatest invention since sliced bread!
*smirks at Sarah’s irony*
That is… quite possibly the most barking thing I have ever seen.
This is truly crazy! This man has issues with women (to say the least).
I don’t know if I should be offended or have pity!
I actually find this e-mail quite entertaining. I would think that anyone writing it could not possibly be serious, seeing as I would never think anyone would be that stupid. But who am I to judge? After all I am a woman and apparently I am not a human. I could have sworn I was. I have all the human organs, but maybe I’m getting my Anatomy mixed up. I suppose we will never know for sure. It’s not like it matters though. It’s just some random guy from who knows where, trying to pretend he knows what he is talking about. Not very well I might add, but oh well. There are always going to be these kind of people in the world. I suppose we should just let them think their crazy thoughts. I guess its better then repressing them.
…people like this need to be “HUNTED” down and shot! oooooohhhh a verb!
@Anna
will you marry me?
As for women not using verbs, he’s obviously never met my mother, the word nazi!
On the subject of Homophobia, I think a lot of people keep getting Homophobic and “I hate homos” mixed up.
-phobia: a combining form meaning “fear,” occurring in loanwords from Greek (hydrophobia); on this model, used in the names of mental disorders that have the general sense “dread of, aversion toward” that specified by the initial element: agoraphobia.
Also, a persistent, irrational fear of a specific object, activity, or situation that leads to a compelling desire to avoid it.
You can be afraid of something but not flat out hate it. It’s also an irrational thing some people can’t control, like a fear of heights or spiders. It’s the people who truly hate homosexuals that are a problem.
how unusual and here i was under the impression that woman used to many verbs
Yes, woman used to many verbs, but woman also used to less pay for equal work.
snarf!
funniest comment on this entire site
Didn’t Debbie do Earth?
No, just Dallas.
Dude, I think you need a woman, that is what you need. You attack us this way because you are unable to get one for yourself. Loser!
I believe that the correct fear that this person has is gynephobia or “fear or women”. Or quite possibly pragmatophobia which is “fear of reality”. Either way this individual suffers from the ’60’s and it’s safe to say that this decade wasn’t good to him. Or for him.
This is just ridiculous. Ridiculous. I of course can’t assume too much here, but the guy has probably gone through far too many divorces, and that’s why he has such a low opinion of women. If women aren’t people, then maybe we should just leave, hm? That would make everything better. After all, women can’t do Earth.
Note all my verbs. And I didn’t even try.
They graduated this cretin? Wow. Now THAT was a big mistake on the part of that university. (The other stuff he mentions? Eh, not so much.)
BTW, Mr. “Class of ‘65″ doesn’t do apostrophes very well, himself. When contracting “it is”, you write “it’s”, not “its”. “Its” is possessive, as in, “This e-mail has ITS funny points, but…”
@Anna
lmaoooooooooo
yo i had a bad dream last night that women had rights….but im fine now cuz i know tht no such thing exists lolll
lololololololololololol!!!!!!!!
Me Tarzan, you Jane.
To be fair, this guy is right about Sociology. The rest is crazy gibberish.
@i_am_bambi
both and maybe some anger and indigestion
And after that, we can work on getting out all the gays and blacks and mexicanos, and start worshipping the Holy Sun God, like the lord says we should!
Misogynist. That said, he is inexpertly expressing some valid concerns about going too with things i.e. Toni Morrison is better as a symbol than as a writer. Women’s studies? How about all those poor men throughout history who actually wanted to be enlightened, sensitive men but felt just as pressured by society to conform to some other norm. Will their story never be told?
The title of this post makes me laugh.
You know…by this man’s logic, having sex with a woman would be beastiality, since women are not human. And if men never slept with women because of the fact that they are not human, then no one would be born, and then humanity would end. That would kinda suck. (At least for humans.) I can’t say for sure but I think maybe he’s just mad because he could never get a woman to sleep with him. Poor guy.
Wow, I think I know who this guy is. Crazy old guy who used to roam campus and tell his conspiracy theories to anyone who would listen. If it’s not the same guy, that’s scary… there are TWO of them out there!!
NOT JUST TWO! HUNDREDS!!!! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
This guy should work on his grammar before he insults women and verbs. They can’t do Life, they can’t do earth.
nope. sorry, i cannot have sex with earth or life, if thats what you mean by “do”.
i can however, crush any and every argument this guy ever makes since he’s such an idiot, i know about life than he does because i accept that both women and men are a part of life. as for earth…. how does one not do earth? are we aliens? are weaklings/ are we stupid?
Gwell, to the asshole who wrote that email: GUESS WHAT? I’m extremely human and i could kick your ass. in fact, I could have about 17 other guys kick your ass AFTEr i get done with you.
Don’t insult women. We hold far too much power.
wow lots of typos. are we weaklings? Well … AFTER
there. much better.
“Jeepers. You’re looking like a bunch of fools.”
LOL Oh, yes, because teaching things like Sociology and Management and *gasp* Women’s Studies are just ridiculous.
I’m sorry, but I’m not sure what the verb thing even had to do with his original argument. I must have missed something. Maybe because I don’t do Earth?
Oh, you sad, lonely man. I’m so glad I don’t have to meet you in person.
Alright. Verb=action word. Therefore if “we” cannot verb….we cannot “suck, f**k, lick, etc. Therefore we cannot please. But, ahhhhh “we” can. And “we” do. Apparently he is void of that kind of “we” in his life. Perhaps he needs to find a good “verbing” hot woman to “verb” him a little. May do his lonely butt some good. Ta
“fake nonsense”=truth? so truth is never good? i pray that someone kicks this guy’s balls if he’s serious.
Looks like someone got dumped…
I was unaware I do not use verbs… hmmm
Women be verbin’ baaaaad
i, also was quite unaware that i do not use verbs. this development is quite interesting considering i like to write short stories in my free time.
waitaminut… has HE done the Earth?! what the hell?
I’m glad someone else realized that women are not people… I’ve been saying this for years.