We Come In Peace
Be prepared to have your minds blown. This amateur astronomer has found irrefutable proof of life on the moon Titan, complete with photograph. It’s as though he’s been there. But we don’t think so. He’s still trying to get there, or have someone get there for him. There’s another Titan-obsessed post over at Item Not As Described today.
Hi XXXXXXXX,
I’m an internet user, so I’m not an expert, but I’m
willing to bet dollars for donuts that you fellows
have your exposure time too long…images are moving
(smearing) through a frame…if you want to make a
make a movie you need to slice the time with more
frames so-to-speak…There’s life on Titan, plenty of it, and the locals
are so curious, both animal and men…if you want more
pics, let me know…if the Gov. has this life in our
solar system a big secret, then I understand…in the
mean time I’m having fun in my spare time looking at
life on Titan, & Mars…Opinion: We need to send a video conferencing device
that we can use as a communication link with locals
there.XXXXX
P.S.: Space exploration is an American adventure, and
I thought you guys would be proud of it…
Submitted By: Anonymous
@crazyemails
Aparatus?
Umbrella tree? Posting board? SNIFFING? What kind of freak society do they run on that Titan moon anyway?
That’s really unfair to build a coliseum so small that the curious animals can’t even get inside!
That animal labelled as ’sniffing’ is doing nothing of the sort. What he(she?/it?) is doing is not suitable for a family website and you shouldn’t be propagating that kind of sleaze.
Golf cart? Bar? Is that bar as in bar of…or a fully stocked Saturday Night kind of bar? Non-expert internet-using minds want to know
He kind of summed it up in the first sentence, “I’m an internet user, so I’m not an expert…”
This is the most curious notation on the picture. I think it’s a piece of bondage furniture purchased at extremerestraints.com…. but I could be wrong.
I, uh… I read that as “asparagus”. So… thanks for making this just a WEE bit less crazy for me.
I really, really want to see a larger version of that picture…
dammit! I can’t read the posting board!!!!
I bet I missed the meeting
wow!!!!! ….. just amazing…. MY HEAD ASPLOEDED
The Gov. is also trying to hide the fact that the moon is actually cheese. I have proof.
As totally natural extra-terrestrial geological formations go, the “Face on Mars” was much more believable.
Oh and BTW, if you want to link to something on Item Not As Described posted on October 9, one wonders why you would expect it to work if you use the date September 4 instead. Website 101, guys: Always check your links.
Coliseum?
Golf cart! And I was just starting to wonder if the Titanians had any class. Phew!
Someone’s been reading a little too much Vonnegut.
I agree marshal, I was thinking the exact same thing! : D
@Andrea
Golf Cart?
I’m just stoked we finally found proof.
I know this is true not crazy cuz I’ve been contacted by representatives of Titan. The government is keeping it secret cuz the Titanians want to breed with our women and the CDC is using the H1N1 flu shots as a means of sedating 1 in every 10 women to ship them to Titan to breed and create a new race that will be used by the UN to enslave all mankind!!!
Make sure you e-mail this to everyone you know!!!
(Disclaimer: Bad grammar above is intentional and this should be filed under sarcasm.)
Are you always an asshole? Oh wait, just checked out your blog and I got a full faceshot of douchebaggery, so no need to answer that question now. K, so let me lecture you for a moment (just ’cause you’re so fond of lecturing around here, and I really want to be like you):
The polite option: Hey white coat, the link to itemnotasdescribed is fucked up! I think it should be to October 9! kthxbai!
The douchebag sanityinjection option: hey you stoopid fucktard — even a child knows to check ur links. I’m sooo much fucking smarter than you (and everyone else for that matter). Damn shame you’ll never be as good as sanityinjection, but I’ll lower my standards occassionally and tell you what to do.
Yes, you annoy me.
UGH, thank you so much! Big smooches for you!!
Must be SpectateSwamp. http://www.thestupidestmanonearth.com
Coliseum? Golf cart? Bleachers? This is obviously Titan’s ill-conceived proposal to host the 2016 Olympics.
The gold cart is my favorite bit. Not only does the writer assume that A) the Titanians have roughly the same anatomy that we do, B) despite living in a culture completely isolated from Earth culture, they still evolved a need to play sports, C) that they independently invented golf too, but that D) they even invented the same devices of convenience for playing golf. Someone check the caddy and see if he’s wearing one of those silly little beanie-hats.
Odd. I look at the picture and I see the following: Rock, rock, rock, rock, and rock.
Yeah, I wish I could see a larger version of that pic too!
You know what I see when I look at the picture? A Waterpark. All the white is actually water slides. That is OBVIOUSLY much more plausible. Also its more fun too.
Is the Ear, eye and tusk of the same animal… or parts of animal/s? Either that’s SERIOUSLY massive, or he’s just said… “hey.. you know.. that looks like a decapitated Ear. Must inform all the correct sources.”
I want whatever drugs this dude is on.
OMG..I’ve just held his descriptive picture upsidedown in front of the mirror…it’s to much to asimilate, this is the proof we have waited for OMG give thanks to xenu..sientology is true…omg i repent……………………………………………………………..
@UGH
Seriously, dude, nobody cares. Get over yourself.
You cared enought to respond. My day is complete now.
You still annoy me.
Actually, I should thank you…got a lot of hits on my site from people curious about what sent you so far off the deep end. Gracias.
Uh….. yeah. I did not need to go to your site, I don’t care about your site. All I know is that you are one of those insufferable people who believes that they know more than god, and guess what? You don’t. YOU need to get over YOURSELF. Okay, very nice, so you know something about IT and just happened to be around on a day when a website makes a mistake so that you can save the day and point it out. Really? Is this how your mind was working when you posted that comment? You are one of those that really, REALLY, need a reality check.
And by the way… those hits were probably from people that hoped you were simply having a bad day, not that you were always THIS much of a complete jer…………*cough*
sanity and ugh…please go on..you know comments from even crazier people…at the moment you is both level pegging, but a real outburst could win you the interweb…go on get creative……………please..
What happened to Voting Fridays?
@Stephanie
it’s between “sanity” ha and “ugh” at the moment……
@mark wingate
Seconded.
Worked for me. Maybe you forgot to hit ‘click’ on the link.
Hmmmm… is that an official poll? And how are you tracking the stats? Or are you running the poll like an Iranian election!
@t-rex
Very official…and I resent the “iranian election dig” the stats are being imagined by my cat president mugabe,and overseen by my outher cat stalin,,so far they have got fatter,and the result is comjng in on monday after the votes are counted….so far it looks like an out right win for KEN…yes iknow his name is not on the ballot paper but hey it’s one up from swinning chad’s…cos if it turns out that Ken is from FLA then the prise will go to who ever contributes the most to the Titan embassey…where i live…..ooooo nother mystrey candidate coming in vote now…vote often and vote right…we receive most votes telepathicly so dont worry about how we know your thought’s….
we heard that……………
WTF? Did this guy just put random lines and circles on the picture and then think of the least plausible explanation he could think of?
@Ken
Welcome to the Space Olympics, the year 3022. Take part in a grand tradition!
heh
Um, isn’t that how we know if a person is crazy or not?
@mark wingate
Even better, a Sudan/Rusko election style judging.
Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
“Ground control to Major Tom Ground control to Major Tom:
Take your protein pills and put your helmet on
Ground control to Major Tom: Commencing countdown engine’s on
Check ig-nition and may God’s love be with you
This is ground control to Major Tom, you’ve really made the grade!
And the papers want to know whose shirts you wear,
Now it’s time to leave the capsule if you dare
This is Major Tom to ground con-trol, I’m stepping through the door
And I’m floating in the most peculiar way
And the stars look very difeerent today
For here am I sitting in a tin can, far above the world
Planet Earth is blue and there’s nothing I can do
BRIDGE
Though I’m passed one hundred thousand miles, I’m feeling very still
And I think my spaceship knows which way to go,
tell my wife I love her very much she knows
Ground control to Major Tom:
Your circuit’s dead, there’s something wong.
Can you hear me Major Tom?
Can you hear me Major Tom?
Can you hear me Major Tom? Can you …
Here am I floating round my tin can, far above the moon
Planet Earth is blue and there’s nothing I can do”
I enjoyed the quotes on this one more than the actual post! You guys made my day.
Dude. DUDE!!! I CAN SEE THE FACE!!!
“Looking at camera” has to be the single most disturbing entry, even beyond apparatus. The fact that he thinks he’s filming animals on Titan is bad. The fact he thinks they can SEE him filming is worse. I mean… LOL?
@Esprix
Larger image (sans identifying marks, sadly)
http://www.nasa.gov/images/content/105780main_image_feature_250_jwfull.jpg
Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes …
Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes …
Eyes and ears and mouth and nose
Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes
I work with the guys who took the actual pictures on Titan. I’ll, uh, pass this along to them. I’m sure they’ll appreciate the input.
Has anyone checked this out yet on Google’s Titan Street View?
@Pers
That’s what it is. The guy’s got his colander hat, his tin foil radar dish, a telescope with a camera attached to it and a keyboard, all the while, David Bowie’s crooning in the background. Hey, if Ziggie was an alien…..
@Cndwrld
ON TITAN ?????????
he needs to hook up with that guy on ‘item for sale not as described’ website who is looking for an astronauht to go to titan. n second thouht it might be the same guy!
Wow. Let’s start mapping the surface of Titan. After all is mapped, start selling lots of land.
“P.S.: Space exploration is an American adventure, and
I thought you guys would be proud of it…”
I wonder how he’d feel if he knew that although Cassini is a NASA probe, the Huygens probe it dropped onto Titan (and which took that picture) was run by the European Space Agency?
somebody needs to tell this guy he’s fucking retarded
p.s. (insert Titan Maximum joke here)
@Sanity Injection
who are you talking to?
@tpark
I think that’s the only part ANYone will be able to see. psychology and stuff..
Aw…He just found Marvin Martians super secret base where he’s working on the PU-36 Explosive Space Mod-U-Lator…
You still have proof?! I ate mine.
That is one large animal on the right. Or is it two large animals? I mean, the tusk is nowhere near the snout, so maybe it’s two… of course it is an alien animal, so maybe it’s shaped differently than Earth animals.
lols @ golfcart
*lol* I like this post but I totally don’t get what he’s trying to say in the first paragraph…is it my english or his crazyness?!?
“I’m an internet user, so I’m not an expert”
thats a lie every internet user is an expert!
im pretty suer the guy is just being a dork, and being very sarcastic… lol
the moon “Titan”: where scale is obsolete!
You’re looking at balls…this close they always look like landscape…
Y’know…
I totally understand how looking at a beach would give you this kind of reaction. I SWEAR I see this stuff in the waves, too. Imagine what it would look like if you brought some magical sight-enhancing mushrooms along with!! Oh, what’s that? You already did?